...

And she prayed as she wished and wished as she prayed that the thoughts of him would eventually subside. That the past would only leave the change within herself taking the memories of his skin upon hers. The memories of spoken truths and deeper unspoken lies. She didn't purposely dwell on the situation. Her mind tried to convince her that she was fine. The silly smiles came across as genuine even as the clenching feeling in her heart tightened. That feeling. The nagging. Never quite letting up. Always there, waiting, preying on her every action. She couldn't stop anything. She did not have control over that ugly thing in her chest.
But then, she thought to only blame herself. She knew. She saw it coming before he did. She tore down the walls and unlocked the doors. She gave him the trust and loyalty she had never given herself...

He betrayed that.
She begged him. Pleaded. That day. Please, don't abuse this.
Please, please, please...



That day. By the pool. She knew. She saw the betrayal in the clear, blue water. She felt his truths deep inside of her. She knew. With each thrust. With each moan. With each sigh.
But they continued. Never once stopping to consider the consequences. His lies. Her hopes. His dreams. Her exagerrations. But the dirty four letter word grew. It overtook them.
It killed them.

She knew. It could never be her. She was merely a replacement for the muse. And he her muse. The circle. Everything in life is a circle.
Perfect. Disasterous. Beautiful.
He was her everything, she his almost.
Need overcame him. Need destroyed her. The love remained, but the feelings changed....
Cancerous? A trainwreck more appropriate. They knew they were only hurting themselves, each other...
The carnage remains.